The happy list

My last post "Jais Aben Reflections" seemed to strike a chord and I've had many wonderful, supportive responses by email, phone, facebook and blog comment. There have been quite a few requests to see the list that I wrote. It is painfully egocentric and, in retrospect, probably rather boastful. However it did cheer me up and bring me back to the surface. 


Read it at your own risk.


Here's the list 

• I'm still reasonably fit, healthy and active and normally enjoy a  positive, optimistic outlook on the world.
•  Somehow, after the death of my wife nearly ten years ago, I managed to raise two sons who have grown into fine young men, both independent, sociable, compassionate, successful in their chosen careers and, I like to think, both still fond of their old man.
• There are people in this world who love and care for me and who I love and care for in return.
• In spite of the miles that separate us I have a strong and supportive family who I believe I could turn to should ever the need arise.
• I have many friends who enrich my life, and a few that are true confidantes.
• Have a reputation for telling really bad jokes - or maybe its telling good jokes badly? Have you heard The Wide Mouth Frog? or my personal favourite about the Faith Healer and the man with the speech impediment?
• I have trekked in the Himalayas, been a crew member on the Tall Ships and sailed my own yacht around the Med all of which provided me with many happy memories and more than a few embarrassing incidents.
• Am now deaf in one ear - which can have its advantages!
• Have lived and worked as a volunteer aid worker on the edge of the Sahel and in the Highlands of Papua New Gunea. I speak bad Hausa and even worse Tok Pisin!
• I've been fortunate to have work that continues to be demanding, enjoyable, fulfilling and has taken me to many wonderful places around the world - India, Bermuda, Hong Kong, Malaysia, Nigeria, USA, Hungary, Papua New Guinea, Spain, Portugal, Sweden, France - even delivered conference presentations in Paris in French (shudder!)
• Have worked for some truly inspirational people and hope that maybe in some small way I may have inspired others.
• Enjoyed living and working in the United States - running a manufacturing business in New Jersey
• Was a Director of a Royal Society in my thirties and later in life I established a successful start up internet technology business
• I have the benefit of a wide ranging, liberal education and gained a Masters Degree, have published two books, recorded two CDs and even had a rude letter about me printed in The Times!
• Was made a Freeman of London for my work in the City.
• Been adviser to HM Treasury, The Stock Exchange, Bank of England and the Corporation of Lloyds - amongst others.
• Been a guest at Buckingham Palace, Windsor Castle, Mansion House , Guildhall and the Palace of Westminster
• I sang solo in St Paul's cathedral, won awards for my music, was once voted "Best male legs in tights" in the National Youth Theatre (obviously many years ago!), played Noah in "Noah", Macbeth in "Macbeth" and "Volpone" in Volpone - even directed my own production of Tom Stoppard's "After Magritte". Have been asked for my autograph at the stage door!!!
• Have always been sporty - Captain of Rugby at my college, rowed first eight and even have friends who tolerate (enjoy?) my erratic tennis. Can handle a punt. Am an exceptionally bad skier with no real expectation of improvement (I once crashed into a blind skier & his guide!) and, although no longer quite as agile as I once was, I'm still a competent dinghy sailor.
• Have "reinvented" myself professionally several times with successful changes in career.
• I'm a good cook! ask my family and friends.
• Still believe that its a great big exciting world and that there are many wonderful things yet to do.

Jais Aben Reflections

My main reason for coming to Jais Aben was to do some scuba diving.  Aquaventures - the scuba diving centre located next to the resort had been described by the Lonely Planet guide as one of the best equipped and most professional outfits in PNG with great dive sites close by.  However, in true PNG style, on my arrival I discover that Aquaventures closed down in August and nobody at the hotel thought it worth mentioning when I made my reservation! 


So no scuba. Not only no scuba but my original thinking was that by joining in with a scuba diving group I would have the company of people with a shared interest. A days scuba and then drinks and dinner with like minded people retelling the days adventures. Sadly that wasn't to be so I feel a little bit like Billy No Mates wandering about the resort on my own and trying to be sociable without coming across as some sort of loner weirdo! Maybe its just me but being a lone guest at a busy resort with lots of families just compounds the feeling of isolation.


Fortunately Jais Aben is a fairly large resort with extensive gardens and the bungalows are well spaced out along the shore. Most of the guests congregate around the pool or at the beach so its quite easy to find somewhere quiet to sit undisturbed and enjoy the peace and tranquility of the place for a few hours.


I spent the afternoon sitting out on the lawn in front of my bungalow looking over the Bismark Sea - a thousand shades of marine turquoise protected from the ocean swell by a coral reef a mile or so off the beach. A gentle onshore breeze kept the day comfortable and with my iPod soundtrack playing Moby, Mumford & Sons, Madeleine Peyroux and Mozart I did nothing except read a little and wave at the canoes passing by - packed with islanders, bananas, coconuts and children - all waving and cheerfully shouting "Apinun !" with great big friendly smiles.


It was idyllic and a rare opportunity to sit quietly with no distractions and to reflect . Maybe it was a state of mind brought on by my "Billy No Mates" condition but, in spite of the blissful surroundings , my reflections inclined towards the morose - a tendency to dwell too much on the mistakes I'd made in the past, reliving some of the unkinder blows that fate had delivered and to mull over the more negative aspects of life. Not wishing to sink even deeper into this "slough of despond" I decided to banish all this depressing reflection  by making a list of all the positive achievements in my life (Count your Blessings I believe its called). 


It worked and my normal sunny disposition has resurfaced.


The list is safely stored on my laptop but if you want to see it then you only have to ask!

Some really beautiful photos of Papua New Guinea

Wish you were here?

An everyday picture - my office in downtown Hagen.

I thought I would put up some photos of "everyday stuff" rather than just special occasions so here's a photo of my office building.  I know it looks like a battery chicken farming unit but its actually pretty good inside and the people I work with more than make up for the rather grim appearance of the office.


The tall bit at the end is the Highland Bakery - producing the most enticing fresh baked bread smell all day! Very difficult to resist.

Kaikai Buai - chewing betel nut

I'm trying to write this entry without it descending into vulgarity and scatalogical humour - I suspect I may fail miserably.

One of the great things about living in the Highlands (and it may be true throughout PNG, I don't know) is that the people here do not use the street as a public toilet! Unlike many other parts of the developing world (and I'm thinking particularly of parts of West Africa, Delhi & other Indian cities) I am not constantly confronted by the sight of someone squatting in the gutter relieving themselves in one way or another. Apart from one little lad who was caught short in the market and rushed off to do his business behind a nearby wall clutching a cabbage leaf as his toilet tissue, I have never seen anyone mess up the street.

It means that the place doesn't stink and its not unpleasant walking around town.

Whilst Hagen does well in the matter of non public defecating it is without doubt the spitting capital of the world! People spit copiously, loudly and regularly in spite of the numerous "No Spitting" signs (Tambu long spetim - in Tok Pisin). It is made much worse, and much more colourful, by the local habit of chewing Betel nuts (Kaikai Buai). Buai is chewed with "pepa" (a hot mustard stick) and "paura" (crushed coral lime) and the reaction of these ingredients does three things. Firstly it gives the individual a slight buzz (not crazy high - just a mild stimulant like very strong coffee). Secondly it causes the saliva glands to go into overdrive and produce astonishing amounts of saliva. Thirdly it turns the saliva (and the teeth & gums) bright red.   So its  chew - spit, chew - spit, chew - spit : you get the picture. The men are expert spitters and can send a well aimed, brightly coloured jet over many yards. The streets are therefore covered in large splatters of bright red spit. When first encountered it can be most alarming because it looks strikingly like blood and you have the impression of walking through a town with blood splattered everywhere! On one occasion I recall seeing a white van covered in what I first thought was blood only to realise that the driver had been chewing buai and spitting red out of the window.

Buai tastes awful. Long time chewers get badly stained teeth - first red then black. Nuts vary in potency and a strong one can cause you to sweat and want to lie down for a few minutes. The "paura" is highly caustic (its lime) and can cause ulcerated cheeks and mouth cancers. Not for me - I've got enough bad habits already.

A School Nativity Play

One of my neighbours is Head Teacher at a local primary school here in Hagen. It was their Christmas end of term event earlier this week and, having been invited, I went along.

It was an evening instantly recognisable to anyone who has attended a school nativity anywhere in the world. A scene complete with angelic and not so angelic children, some confident - some less so, some enthusiastic - some shy and slightly embarrassed . There were the inevitable shepherds with tea towel headwear and the kings with cardboard crowns. Proud parents all around with cameras flashing and video cameras much in evidence. Silent night and a baby doll in the clean straw of the Bethlehem stable.

Confronted by this flashback to the days when my own children were this age and being surrounded by all these adoring parents I suddenly felt profoundly alone and very far away from all the people that I care most about. It was unusual for me to feel that way. I'm normally upbeat and very positive about my stay here but I guess that underneath this grumpy old exterior I'm just a big sentimental softie at heart.

I didn't have time to dwell on my emotions however because three quarters of the way through the performance the heavens opened and the noise of the rain hammering on the corrugated sheet roof drowned out any sound coming from the stage. This was followed by the inevitable power cut! Pitch black inside and no emergency lighting. The kids were real troopers and, after a few moments hesitation, they just continued performing in the dark . A few parents had torches and the light from dozens of mobile phones and car headlights shining in through the windows just about saved the evening.

I wonder if I've still got those old photos of the Oddingley Playgroup Nativity? Must check when I get home.

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Highland Dancers - PNG style!

Went out for a drive today with a PNG friend of mine to visit his "tok ples" (home village) about an hour away from Hagen. En route we passed through a small town where a major celebration was underway. There was singing & dancing in full traditional Highland dress - Birds of Paradise feathers all over the place. It was great to stumble across this authentic, definitely not for the tourists, celebration.


Here's a few photos of these rather fearsome looking Highland Dancers.

Tru Prens

Earlier this week I had lunch with the "Tru Prens" club. Translated from Tok Pisin it means "True Friends" and its a support group for women who are HIV+.

They get together on a regular basis to share a meal and help each other with the problems they face and to enjoy each others company. Its a happy, laughter filled, chatty occasion but much informal learning can take place in this environment and the women obviously benefit.

The existence of such a support group in PNG is in itself an extraordinary step forward. The social stigma attached to HIV+ is so great here that many HIV positive people will hide their condition for fear of the consequences. The consequences are real and in the rural areas can be very severe indeed - not just exclusion from the family or clan but there are well documented cases where, through ignorance about HIV transmission, whole clans/villages have turned on HIV+ individuals with appalling results, including burying people alive. In one reported case a woman who was known to be HIV+ was made to live in a six feet deep hole in the ground covered with tarpaulin. The village passed food down to her in her hole. She died within a month.

So to see twenty HIV + women laughing, chatting and enjoying their lunch was an extraordinary and encouraging experience.

I've been very impressed with the Baptist Church's response to HIV/AIDS here in PNG. Its only a few years ago that the Pastors would have regarded any talk of sexual activity as sinful and certainly not an area relevant to their ministry. Yet here we are a few years later and they talk in church about safe sex, the use of condoms, how AIDS spreads, how to help and support those with HIV. At one World Aids Day event in the church the Tru Prens sang their own song which included the words "If you want to have sex with me use a condom" words that would have been completely unacceptable just a few years ago. The church also recognises that the Pastors' wives have a key role to play and they too are being included in the training programmes. Their HIV programme is holistic - not just concentrating on the medical impact of AIDS but recognising its economic and social impact as well - so there are sports and arts projects for young people, support groups (apart from Tru Prens their is also a group called "Tru Warriors" for HIV+ men), awareness training programmes and projects like mine to provide sustainable livelihoods.

There is a long way to go and many practical difficulties to overcome but its so encouraging to see good people making a real effort to make things happen.

Sanap Wantaim!

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